


imaginary friend

by grapejuiceantidote (riddleb9y)



Series: But, I'm Doing This For Your Own Good [1]
Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Character Analysis, Child Abuse, Childhood Trauma, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Edward Nygma Has Bad Parents, Edward Nygma Has Mental Health Issues, Gen, Headcanon, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Non-Graphic Violence, Other, he's manipulative but he's all ed's got, sweet hallucination ed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-24
Updated: 2021-01-24
Packaged: 2021-03-16 05:53:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 817
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28951485
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/riddleb9y/pseuds/grapejuiceantidote
Summary: my take on how the riddler got his namePart 1
Relationships: Edward Nygma & Hallucination Edward Nygma
Series: But, I'm Doing This For Your Own Good [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2123502
Kudos: 8





	imaginary friend

“Wake up sleepy head.”

The voices echoed as he regained consciousness, blinking harshly. The cheery tone put him on edge as he fumbled for his glasses. His eyes darted across the room, but he couldn’t find anyone else. Tentatively he asked, “W-where are you?”

“Over here, dummy.” 

When Ed turned to the opposite side of his bed. He stared at the figure, a twin of himself, in shock. He wanted to run or at least gasp, but his body froze, focused on this doppelganger. “What-who are you?”

The other Ed pouted, but something in his eyes remained playful. Like he enjoyed Ed’s confusion. “Technically I’m you.”

“No-no you’re not!” He noticed his pajamas, remembering the previous day. Morning, school, walk home- He jumped off the bed. “How did I get home yesterday? What did you do?!”

The figure smiled, “I took care of you, Eddie.” He leaned forward, his voice compassionate and warm. “Dad was drunk and after those kids at school, I wanted you to rest.”

He sniffed, “That-that’s impossible.” A tear fell down, and he rubbed under his glasses. He wouldn’t cry. His parents get mad when he cries.

The other Ed stiffened, “No. No Eddie. It’s just like an imaginary friend. Lots of people have them.”

“No,” He spat the word, ignoring his trembling lip. “Children have them and they grow out of them. Not into them!.”

Approaching, the hallucination patiently nodded. “I know but we’ve never been normal. But, you need me Eddie.” Relaxing again, wearing a stupid grin, the twin pointed at Ed’s bedside clock. “You better go make breakfast. They’ll be awake soon.”

“But-Why?”

“Because I care about you, Eddie. Because I understand you better than anyone.” He clapped with a chuckle, “I’m technically you.”  
.....  
"Why are you so mean?"

Other Ed glared at him, "He deserved it. He made fun of us, of you." 

The anger in the mirror was oddly misplaced, twisted in aggression Ed never expressed. Maybe his reflection had a point. Bullies were asking for it, but he never wanted to make anyone cry the way Brian Schulder blubbered. Why had he let other Ed do it? It was rude, and karma would settle the score. 

Although he didn't say those words exactly. Instead, he shrugged, avoiding his own gaze. 

"We're not supposed to eavesdrop at Mom's parties." He defended weakly.

"Mom's not supposed to have parties. And if Mrs. Schulder wants to go to hang out with all of Mom's hookups and cry about wanting a divorce, it's not our fault."

Ed shook his head, "Don't talk about it. We shouldn't of-"

"Oh come on, Eddie. He'll get over it."

Would Brian get over his parent's divorce? Probably. It was better than having two failed and trapped parents under the same roof. Mr. Schulder was curt and square. He couched the little league and hosted barbecues, embodying the family man stigma. Ed hadn't seen or hear about him hurting them, but people not liking each other leads to abuse, and maybe it was better for Brian's parents to split before that point.

"What has 13 hearts, but no other organs?"

The riddle caught him off guard, but he was quick to answer. "A deck of cards."

His reflection grinned. "Correct, Eddie. You're getting better."

"We're the same."

"No, I'm better at riddles." Other Ed continued to smile while Ed pouted. "But, don't worry, one day you'll beat me. Until then you have to follow my lead. 'Kay?"

Nodding, Ed answered. "Okay. Promise."

"Good boy."

.....

His mother was gone. Years of abuse at his father's hand, and now she runs away? He feels stupid. Of course, she'd leave him. She had never wanted him in the first place. Neither had his father. That much has been clear. His fists hit harder, and his drinking was more than excessive. Because his mother is gone. Because he's left with his mistake of a son.

Fumbling down the hallway, he barely stumbles into the room. And on his bed is his better, stronger half, wearing a bored expression that makes him choke out another sob. He quickly climbs on top of his bed, laying his head in the other boy's lap. 

"Shh, it's okay," A hand strokes through Ed's curls. "I've got you."

Sobbing harder, Ed buries his head into other Ed's stomach. The figure starts to rock him and if he weren't Ed's alter, the boy would feel shame in the weak display.

"Why don't you let me take over? Take a break."

"No! You always-"

"Protect you?"

"It's not normal." He sniffs, making no move to evade the comfort provided. "I want to be normal."

A hand strokes Ed's cheek like it's trying to wipe the tears. "You have to survive this before normal, Eddie. Okay? Just go to sleep." 

Lately, he's been refusing the offer. But tonight, he curls into himself, smaller and smaller, until he disappears.

**Author's Note:**

> i really like gotham bc while its set in another canon, it has good psychoanalysis stuff and i think ed's DID should've been explored and properly represented. mind that im not a mental health expert but i do suffer from DDD, anxiety, ptsd, depression, and to clarify THIS IS NOT ROMANTICIZING. if it seems that way, that is because ed is characterized as someone with a codependent attachment.


End file.
